Saddest Three Words in Life

When I was growing, up I had an uncle who would say the saddest two words in life are "too late" whenever something didn't occur on time or someone was late in meeting an obligation. Everyone thought it was brilliant but we never paused to test the statement or to try and think of two words that were sadder. For example, "too late" is not sad if a person was late, missed a flight and the plane crashed and all aboard were killed. "Guilty" sounds sad but I remember a country song entitled "Guilty of Loving You" so that is proof that "guilty" does not always have to be a sad word.

I give this as background because I am convinced I have discovered the absolute saddest three words in life, the dictionary or anywhere else you want to look. Maybe a little more background is in order.

For the past few months, I had noticed that I was getting thirsty more often than usual, but I didn't pay too much attention to it since I would just consume some liquid and the thirst would go away...for a while. Finally, Mrs. RamFanatic and Leroy, the Tar Heel Terror, convinced me that I should go to Dr. Mann, my primary UNC physician, and have it checked out. I agreed partially because this would give me and Dr. Mann an opportunity to discuss matters relating to UNC, more particularly the fortunes of the basketball team.

On the way to Dr. Mann's Office, I stopped at our new Krispy Kreme shop and got 6 lemon filled beauties. Something told me not to consume any of them since I had been warned by Mrs. RamFanatic, a veteran of over 30 years in the medical field, that my thirstiness might have something to do with my blood sugar level.

Dr. Mann ran a blood sugar test and found mine to be 180. This, according to him, was high and he then said those dreaded words "NO MORE SUGAR." I went into shock initially but finally mumbled, "You mean I can't ever have any more sweets?" He calmly replied that it wasn't as bad as I was making it and that I would be able to have sweets in moderation after we reduced my blood sugar to an acceptable level. I didn't bother to tell him about the Krispy Kremes in the car.

Why am I telling you all of this? Well, I'm now into my 4th day without sugar and it has not been easy. It occurred to me that my personality could change as a result of no sugar and I wanted to warn you lest it show up in my writings. I will make every effort to remain cheerful but I make no promises. I find that most of my waking hours are spent thinking of all kinds of sweets and Mrs. R had the nerve to ask me last night, what was the first sweet I was going to eat once the sentence was lifted? It brought back memories of the mid 60's when I suffered a broken jaw in an automobile accident. My jaws were wired together and all of my food intake went through a blender. Remind me to tell you that you should never put spaghetti or beans in a blender. The worst part of that situation was smelling good food and not being able to partake of same. The absolute worst was when I once was present when Kentucky Fried Chicken was being served. I thought I was going to die if I didn't' get away from that aroma and I bet you can guess what my first meal was once the wires were removed. That would have made a good commercial for KFC.

I have given a great deal of thought to what I will have once the embargo is over and, believe me, the competition was stiff. One minute I thought it would be banana pudding and the next it was pecan pie. Malted milk shakes were a strong contender as was pineapple cake. "Little Debbie" did herself proud but they have gotten so small, they may not count. My favorite is raisin cream. But the winner by a wide margin was Krispy Kreme. I have agreed not to get creme filled ones, the regular glazed will do nicely, thank you.

So now, I have a new hobby. Beginning last Wednesday, I have begun to try and learn as much as I can about blood sugar, insulin, pancreas, sugar free recipes and anything else associated with diabetes. Mind you, I haven't been told I have diabetes and maybe I won't be but I want to know as much about the disease as I can since my mother had it and I understand it can run in families

So between my new physical ailment and the play of the Tar Heels, I may not be my usual cheerful self for the next few days. The Heels could contribute mightily to my state of mind by winning out and Lord knows, a Krispy Kreme or two would do wonders for my disposition right now.

RamFanatic